Ads

Q	Why?
A	To create new revenue streams and maximise shareholder value by exploiting existing IP.
Q	I don't see any ads.
A	The ads become available at the start of April in your local time zone, and require the game language to be set to English, French, German, or Russian. Also, make sure that you are not in a beta branch on Steam.
Q	I do see ads and I wish I didn't.
A	If you really must drive me to ruin with your unwillingness to see ads in a game you already paid money for, go into Settings & Info in the main menu to turn them off.
Q	I'm not entirely clear on how to purchase the advertised items.
A	You may request a detailed catalogue of items by sending two Gug Shillings or other coins of equivalent value to 11 Uncouth Road, New Glottenbourg.
Q	Is spider tonic made out of spiders? Is it to prevent spiders? Is it for spiders???
A	What ridiculous questions. Everyone knows what spider tonic is.
Q	Are Ambition Pills safe to take?
A	We have heard no complaints.
Q	How do I drink floatmead?
A	Bow your head and then carefully invert the flagon to let the mead float upwards into your mouth. Swallow carefully.
Q	Help! I have bred too many geckos! They're in the walls! They're everywhere!
A	Send a letter to 11c Goat Lane, Cogburgh. Enclose 3 florins to receive our highly efficaceous anti-gecko tincture.
Q	I have attempted to eat a Heptascuit.
A	Send a letter to 11d Goat Lane, Cogburgh, enclosing your teeth.
Q	April Fools?
A	Yes.